The Grid,Coney Island's Technology Of The Fantastic And The Errection Of The Skyscraper

NOTE:one of my school papers;not my personal ideeas,but still interesting enough(i think) to be worth posting.


MOTTO: Nullum est iam dictum quod non dictum sit prius.
Nothing is said that hasn't been said before. (Terence)

Have you ever wondered how it all started, why it happened like this and not some other way, what was the setting and the circumstances that gave life to the "concrete jungle" that is todays Manhattan? The most cosmopolite city in the world, one of the modern wonders, a sculpture so grandiose in it's violent upward pursuit of the "American Dream" that it became it's insignia. But it didn't stop there , it went on and dazzled the whole world whith it's shameless conquest of virtual realities, thus becoming the Automonument, undeniable proof that gravity itself was to fall under it's tremendeous power,a power so multivalent and unprecedented that was able to change values and aspirations,conceptions and facts people took for granted. And to think it is all based on such simple, tangible things, only increases it's value tenfold.
The real estate business and the entertainment business are two of the most capital abundent areas of international trade at the present moment. Here, in Manhattan, lay most of their glory and success. And for good reason. This paper proposes to reveal some insight on how real estate was given it's crucial touch that brought it where it is today in terms of functional architecture(as beauty descended into the "hell of functionality") and tremendeous possibilities through the power of the irresistible synthetic(tehnology of the fantastic and the skyscraper).
In 1807 Simon deWitt,Gouvernor Morris and John Rutherford came up whith the boldest urbanistic prediction of all times: the Grid. It's pragmatism and rigurosity gave the impression of harmony,order and prosperity. It's programatic devise was that of a better world , it's rule- everlasting.
"The Apotheosis of the gridiron"-"whith it's simple appeal to unsophisticated minds", lobbied for facilitating the "buying, selling and improving of real estate". The grid had the ability to neutralise and reduce the terrain it was applied on to the theoretical state of being plane, perfecting all the inconveniences of the topography which stood in the way of simple and efficient construction. It divided Manhattan in 2028 blocks by means of 12 avenues running north-south and 155 streets running east-west,excluding topographical accidents. It left little room for any spaces other than sheer construction sites appart from the designed "accidents" of Central Park in 1853, and this was possible because Manhattan was an island. The ample arms of the sea took care of Manhattans need for "pleasure and health as well as commerce and convenience". The Grid also provided the solid basis and configuration for constructing the cheapest form of housing ever: square.But the true manifesto of Manhattanism was so outrageous and unconcievable that it could never be openly declared: under its apparent neutrality, it claims the superiority of "mental construction over topography", virtual over existing, provides means for the "subjugation,if not obliteration of nature". The consequences of it's bilinear structure and the fact that Manhattan was in island left room for 3D anarchy and predicted that the city couldn't and would not grow in any conventional way-the architects and engineers that were in charge of sculpting the face of Manhattan had to come up whith innovative ways to differentiate one block from another.But the activities it framed were fictious, the population-conjectival, the buildings-phantoms,thus turning architecture into Manhattan's religion. To the present date, it is considered to be the "negative symbol of the shortsightedness of commercial intrests".
Under the pressure of constant urban developement, the need for escaping the realities of the modern metropolis was undeniable. The Central Park area was the first site to be reserved for leisure and relaxation activities, constituting the first succesful attempt to synthesize and reproduce nature. All of it's accidents were carefully planned, mature trees were transplanted there, all of it's naturality was forged by human hand and held up by an "invisible infrastructure that controlled it's assembly". Central Park was a "synthetic Arcadian Carpet", describing the way that culture outdistanced nature,blurring-like the grid itself- the line between the built and the unbuilt. It reveals the power within the philosophy of the irresistable synthetic.
In 1853, after conquering it's ambition (stirred up by the example of London's International Exhibition) and organizing it's own fair on the site which is today's Bryant Park, Manhattan fuels it's quest to bypass physical obstacles by means of innovative and, for that time, futuristic tehnological advancements. The proposal of various(undreground,on-grade and elevated) means of mass transportation, which , if layed out at the same time,would destroy each other's logic , plus numerous other new technological avantgarde products, all of which were eventually turned loose on the island, elevated Manhattan to the status of a synthetic "urban jungle" gouverned by the law of the survival of the fittest(machine) and celebrated the democtarisation of the object. But one of these inventions was to change the face of Manhattan, and to a lesser degree, that of the world: the elevator.
Primitive elevators were in use as early as the 3rd century BC, operated by human, animal, or water wheel power. From about the middle of the 19th century, power elevators, often steam-operated, were used for conveying materials in factories, mines, and warehouses.
In 1853, American inventor Elisha Otis demonstrated a freight elevator equipped with a safety device to prevent falling in case a supporting cable should break. This increased public confidence in such devices,practically introducing the elevator in the realm of commerce, shows the possibility to use it for human safe huma transportation. But the credit of the inventor is not limited to only this aspect;he creates a precedent for an incredibly effective marketing strategy;the presentation he puts up at the fair to advertise his invention is spectacular: he takes his elevator to a considerable height and, taking a dagger off a red cushion, cuts one of the cables, but inventor and invention remain suspended and safe. By doing this ,Otis establishes a state of mind that will influence not only real estate but ALL business indeology and ,thus, developement of Manhattan: the non-event becoming the event, the "anticlimax as deneoument", the monumental skyscraper becoming it's own brand.
In the late 19th century, the technological advancements of the industrial revolution were resources of great power for the huge population's evergrowing need for subtrefuge. But they were yet to raw to be to be transplanted directly into Manhattan. That doesen't mean that the projects in Coney Island were the results of some kind of conspiracy, but they influenced the city's very growth.
Coney Island was the host of an amazing variety of fairs, theme parks , all sorts of rides, accomodations and restaurants,it even gave the hot dog to the world. It was gradually connected to it's reservoir of visitors. The completion of the Brooklyn Bridge in 1923 turned summer sundays'Coney into the most densely populated place in the world.
In 1883 the antigravitational impulse of architecture is put to the test in a ride called Loop-da-Loop. It is the precursor of the famous wooden rollercoaster of Coney Island,ahich was built the very next season. In 1895, a mutant rollercoaster-Shoot-the Chutes, gave a new twist to this battle whith gravity.
Coney Island even had a mechanical horsetrack-Steeplechase- which allowed the user limited control over it's speed by using his weight, so it still was, in essence, a real race.
But the conquest of nature is only beginning;the first tryumphal achievements of the irresistible synthetic were a machine- The Inexhaustible Cow- (a milk dispenser shaped as a cow which had "superiour" milk due to it's constant flow, hygienic quality and controlled temperature) and a hotel shaped as an elephant,"as big as a church".
By 1890, electricity was introduced and the number of varieties exploded;the possibility of a "second daylight" arrose , announcing Coneys fertility peaking. In the years to come, this small appendix of Manhattan's yealded not only theme parks like Luna(it's surface was "not of this earth, but the moon",it even had a spaceship elevator that rose 100 feet in the air to a settlement of thousands of lights;a few numbers give an ideea of it's immensity:1.700 employees,1.300.000 lights,60.000.000 dollars in admission fees;it was the most modern fragment of the world at that time. )or Dreamland(which was it's bigger,much more refined themepark run by Sen. Wiliam H.Reynolds,also real estate promoter,who understood that his creation had to compromise it's origins-Steeplechase and Luna- by appealing to all masses, thus elevating it to an ideological plane.Among other activities, the park reproduced a fragment of venice,the vulcanic erruption of the Fall of Pompeii but also a circus and a Shoot-the-Chutes),anti-alienation devices like the Barrels of Love(two cylinders mounted in line, revolving in opposite directions, feeding men at one and women at the other end into the machine),intimacy creators(everybody knowes the Tunnels of Love) or nerve-relaxing activities (Shoot the Freak) , but also widened the gap between appearance and essence, the main impulse that strenghtened the creation of the real skyscraper.But the project that was most relevant in this case was an enourmos building, the globe tower,an enormous sphere which, through sheer size alone, would have been able to claim the status of a resort:700 feet high ,whith a total floor space of 5.000.000 square feet and the capacity of 50.000 people at one time, able to reproduce the part of the world it occupied 5000 times over. Visitors were fed to the structure by all types of available transportation devices(underground, boats,elevators) ,it hosted,among others, a hyppodrome, a revolving restaurant,casinos, circusses and a hotel.The project also implicitly used social stratification(foe example the planned Italian Garden on one of the higher levels was more expensive than the equatorial revolving restaurant). It embodied (as a metaphor,through it's shape) of the power of the skyscraper to reproduce and overpower the world it is built upon. <>By 1908 it became clear that the most impressive architectural project ever conceived was a fraud,and it's maker, Tilyou, left whith the problem of "cleaning up" the foundation.
In 1911,ironically enough, Dreamland burned to the ground(it hosted a fake fire extinguishing show), followed by Luna in 1914. By the mid 20th century, Robert Moses had turned half of the island into public parks-"a model for a modern Manhattan of grass".
Rebuilding Coney Island's parks was never considered, but the product that was to continue it's existence was the skyscraper.
Whith the elevator beeing a reliable tool for conquering progressively higher grounds and the inexhautible "demand for business" in the city, the skyscraper started to grow,and so, slowly injecting it's philosophy-the metropolitan paradox- into social aspirations: the further away from the ground, the closer to what remains of nature(eg.light,air),the more undesirable circumstances left behind/below. The 1909 theorem presents the skyscraper as an utopian formula for the creation of an indefinite number of virgin sites on the same urban location, separated and independent of each other,over the contents of which the architect had no control, thus forging a form of unknowable urbanism. But the true nature of this creation- it's unpredictable performance- was not acceptable to it's makers;an aliby was needed, and it was built on two aspects: the"supposedly insatiable demands of business" and the fact that Manhattan was an island, thus lateral expansion beeing not an option. This gave the skyscraper errection the status of inevitable.
The "paraphernalia of illusion" tested in Coney Island's artificial paradise (electricity,air- conditioning,tubes, telegraphes,tracks,elevators) now became merely agents of accomodation of business, beeing able to turn raw space into offices. So, the fantastic technology is now disguised as pragmatic technology. There followed:
Flatiron Building-22 floors
World Tower Building-30 floors
Benson(City Investing)Bulding-32 floors
By 1911, the "conceptual stratosphere" of the 100th floor was reached: "when the real estate brokers shall have found a suitable city block,the men and millions will be ready".
But the real Skyscraper is not yet completed. Starting in 1853 whith the Latting Observatory,continuing whith Luna Park bright towers and minarets in 1904, Dreamland's Beacon Tower in 1905 and the Globe Tower project in 1906, the tower has achieved the connotations of self contained universe,marker of pleasure zones, and was elevated to the subconsciously percieved rank of symbol of tehnological progress. So, it's transplantation on the rectiliniar skyscraper of the moment created a matured product, a building that not only had the functional capability to create virgin sites on the same block, but also gives meaning and beauty to the creation, upholding it's promise to conquer new realities. Fusion examples of that time are the Singer Building tower, finished in 1908,the Metropolitan Building, finished in 1909 and the Woolworth Building("Cathedral of Commerce") in 1913.
So , the transplanted technology from Coney Island preserved, whithin it's very essence, the ideology of the science of the fantastic, incubated and cultivated it it's vast variety of projects. But yet another mutant of architecture was to add it's contribution to the skyscraper's achievement of it's programmed unpredictability.
Madison Square Garden hosts at the end of the 19th century a series of exhibitions (replicas of old Nurrenberg, London,Venice) but they do not prove to be intense enough to justify the volume of the building.
In 1905, Thompson, the creator of Luna, buys a block between 43th and 44th streets and turns it into a high-tech set for a show-"A Yankee Circus On Mars" in his ambition to "reproduce" a spacecraft.
In 1908. on 42 street( so-called "Dreamstreet" ) Henri Erkins lays out a project called "Murray's Roman Gardens", "the realistic reproduction(...)of the roman residences". He makes the recognition of the perception of real volume impossible by using a big number of mirrors, prooving once again the victory of the virtual space and mental projection, over the laws of nature, showing that possibilities of space transfiguration whithin the block and thus block interdifferenciation were unlimited,claiming the monumental supremacy of the synthetic.
The status of the Automonument skyscraper was set. But it was one of it's symptoms that made it ideologically correct and consequently viable in the real infrastructure of Manhattan. To make the Automonument which inspires serenity and permanence inhabitable, tactics were developed to efficiently accomodate life,which is by definition antimonumental. As the interior volume needed to accomodate such grandiose activities as well as the growth of business,it grew in cubic leaps,but the exterior could only grow by square surfaces. This fact gave way to the architectural equivalent of a lobotomy,a surgical process that disconnects thought process from emotions."In Western Architecture there has been the humanistic assumption that it is desirable to establish a moral relationship between " the exterior and the interior of a building."The <> facade speaks about the activities it conceals". "Beyond a certain critical mass" ,less and less outter surface had to represent more and more internal activity, thus neutralising it to the point of rectiliniarity. This gave the finite skyscraper product the ability to hide everyday life and the "agonies of the continous changes raging inside it". It was finally ready to take it's rightful place in the world of the grid.

To the present date, the developement of real estate business along whith the growth of the skyscraper has presented no furhter inovations, just plain developement. It is in places like Madison Square Garden that we see the interconnection between real estate and entertainment in America. It is in places like the "potential Globe Tower" that we see it's economical finality ,it is in every square foot of a skyscraper that we feel the entertaining exaltation of endless possibilities . But the best example of entertainment and real estate fusing into a subtle masterpiece is, in my oppinion, the Empire State Building,a building accomodatind millions of dollars of business but providing the observation point on top, which allowes masses to marvel at the Automonument itself- MANHATTAN. It's fame turned it into an iconic brand,powerful enough to represent New York worldwide. Now that is what I call profitable business!


Bibliography- Rem Koolhas- "Delerious New York"
Links:
http://project1.caryacademy.org/TurnofCentury/NYLeisureTime.htm
http://www.esbnyc.com/tourism/tourism_history.cfm?CFID=14220&CFTOKEN=1408
http://inventors.about.com/library/inventors/blelevator.htm
http://www.westland.net/coneyisland/articles/globetower.htm
http://www.coneyisland.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi?board=news;action=display;num=1172621400;start=3#3

have it your way

Viata rupe filmu

o zi ca oricare alta. ma duc sa imi potolesc pornirile antisociale cauzate de caldura intepatoare la sala de forta. sunt multumit de energia mea de sportiv amator , dar simt nevoia sa imi cuantific pauza si sa imi satisfac nevoile de fumator profesionist cu ajutorul unei tigari bine tasata intre exercitiile pentru abdomen si sauna de final.
copiii se bucura cel mai mult de caldura si de soare. pe un petec de iarba proaspat cosita s-au adunat vre-o duzina. sunt si baieti si fete, rad si fac multa galagie.( imi amintesc de vremea cand vacantele de vara erau interminabil de lungi iar eu inca nu stiam ce inseamna sa nu ai timp) ...cam asa ca si baietii astia doi care isi arata unul altuia ce am mai vazut prin Matrix. se pare ca tuturor le-a placut filmul. s-au adunat intr-un cerc toti si ii incurajaza pe cei doi sa continue. spectacolul se transforma repede dintr-o joaca intr-o adevarata bataie de strada. acum au si arbitru, unul mic si cu ochelari, poate cel mai mic dintre toti. cand lucrurile devin prea serioase, ii desparte pe cei doi luptatori si apoi le face semn ca pot continua. sunt stupefiat. loviturile nu sunt deloc usoare,cei doi de mult nu se mai joaca. ceilalti copii se imbulzesc in jurul confruntarii , agitati si incercand sa isi sustina favoritul prin strigate si indemnuri de stadion.
incercand sa imi explic ce se intampla cu ei , nu sunt convins ce ar trebui sa fac:sa ma duc sa ii despart sau sa imi consolez pasivitatea gandindu-ma ca doar se distreaza. arbirtul da semne de slabiciune, nu ii mai poate stapani pe cei doi care s-au incins si s-au inrosit. parca sunt doi cocosi obositi care se bat doar pentru ca trebuie, nu pentru ca vor.sunt in culmea gloriei,nu se pot opri acum.atmosfera se incinge rapid. asta mai mic din partea dreapta nu cred ca are mai mult de 7 ani. de fapt nimeni din grupul fanatic nu cred ca e mai mare de 10-11 ani.
osciland inca intre impulsul de a ma duce sa ii despart si fascinatia cu care observ ce se intampla, ma gandesc cum ar putea decurge o discutie intre parintii unuia dintre cei doi babieti din ringul improvizat:-"draga, te uiti numa la porcarii(vreau sa ma uit la local kombat)...nu ti-e clar ca Esmeraldo e tatal copilului?(chiar vreau sa ma uit la local kombat) te uiti la serialul asta in fiecare zi si nu intelegi nimic(proasto) . nici nu stiu de ce te mai uiti la el...(proasto)ia da telecomanda aia ...uite ca se plictiseste si copilul asta. ia da pe mardeala...local combat, ia uite. bai costelus, hai sa te uiti cu tata la sport, vrei?(l-am racolat pe asta micu', sigur nu o sa ma mai dai la o parte din fata televizorului in seara asta) tu taci si termina cu ciorba aia odata ca imi sar ochii de foame(la cratita cu tine...io toata ziua muncesc si tu te ingrasi pe spinarea mea)(te-am facut ,tu!)(ma mananca tatuaju', oare cornel a curatat acul cand mi l-a intarit ieri?...ia ca l-a facut nocaut.bine bei baiatu'!")
firiul gandurilor mi se rupe brusc in momentul in care unul dintre cei doi este trantit la pamant. arbitrul nu considera ca e momentrul sa intervina deoarece e prea tarziu pentru invins. copii se aduna in jurul lui, il lovesc cu picioarele, injura si ei cum stiu(destul de bine) si il indeamna pe cel care a ramas in picioare sa termine ce a inceput. e galagie si nu inteleg nimc din urletele salbatice ale hoardei agitate. invingatorul prinde curaj si incepe sa isi loveasca adversarul cazut cu piciorul si cu sete. publicul e in culmea extazului:"da-i, asa, omoara-l" iar eu sunt mult prea socat ca sa intervin. stau si ma zgaiesc la fel ca...vorba aia:"asa e soarta boului, vitel adult, sa stea la poarta noului nitel mai mult." in situatii de nehotarare poti suna un prieten, asa ca asta voi face.. eu inca nu pot crede ca e o bataie in toata regula.
" nu o sa iti vina sa crezi ce se intampla in fata mea. copii organizeaza batai in fata blocului."in timp ce ii descriu amicului ce se intampla, imi dau seama ca meciul este complet...acum copii au si un comentator,pe mine.incidentul m-a inghitit si pe mine. gata, s-a terminat prima si ultima runda a meciului. respir usurat si ma gandesc ca ,daca ar mai fi continuat, m-as fi vazut obligat sa intervin, in ciuda faptului ca mi s-ar fi parut destul de ridicol sa ma aflu in aceasta postura.
insa publicul se reasambleaza si alti doi se ofera voluntari pentru o noua infruntare. de data asta loviturile sunt din ce in ce mai serioase. sunt pe punctul de a ceda in favoarea impulsului de a ii desparti. publicul participa la bataie , ii inghesuie pe concurenti intr-un cerc din ce in ce mai stramt. o fata il loveste pe unul dintre luptatori cu o coarda peste picioare...tine cu celalalt si considera ca este cazul sa isi ajute favoritul. cu o miscare demna de luptele gladiatorilor, acesta isi placheaza adversarul ,il tranteste intr-o gramada de iarba cosita si ii aplica o ploaie de lovituri cu pumnii si coatele.
decid sa actionez.ezit pentru ca nu stiu daca voi avea destula autoritate incat sa fiu luat in serios si sa reusesc sa pun capat acestui incident. dar se pare ca cineva mi-a luat-o inainte. o femeie in papuci de casa se grabeste catre locul faptei , il insfaca de ureche pe gladiatorul ei si il ridica de pe adversarul sau. spiritele se linistesc brusc , tipetele dispar si gasca se sparge. femeia isi ia odrasla in casa.
speriati de posibilitatea unei pedepse ulterioare, toata lumea revine la activitatile obisnuite...fetele sar coarda intr-un colt, baietii pun la cale un joc de v-ati ascunselea.nu mai inteleg nimc.. toata energia evenimentului s-a risipit in blocurile din jur. acum e liniste si totul pare normal. doar eu stau si incerc sa-mi explic ce s-a intamplat de fapt.
oare acestia sunt delincventii de maine, trimisi de delincventii de ieri la joaca pe palier? de unde atata energie negativa stocata intr-un copil de 10 ani? ma gandesc ca e mai bine ca m-am nascut pe o strada cu pensionari. mi-e groaza sa ma gandesc cum ar arata o disputa intre baietii care frecventeaza bodega de dupa colt. ma grabesc sa intru inapoi si sa imi termin programul pentru ca e deja tarziu si nu as vrea sa ma prinda seara pe aici. nu cred ca vreau sa fiu martorul vre-unui atentat cu anthrax sau mai stiu eu ce orori de acest gen.ori poate vreo rapire, ca sunt si asa la moda acum.
concluzia? ma intreb si eu. dar daca ma intreaba cineva acest lucru, nu voi sti ce sa raspund. stiu doar ca am ramas cu un sentiment de dezamagire,teama, stupoare si fascinatie, gandindu-ma ca , parca, "noi nu eram asa". oare odata cu trecerea anilor si dezvoltarea cailor de acces la informatie cadem din ce in ce mai repede si mai frecvent prada viciilor si insuubordonarii ce ne vor afecta cu siguranta discernamantul? (e da' hai lasa, ca treaba merge inainte si asa).
mai bag o tigara si ma duc la sauna , poate-poate prind vreo paruiala la vestiarul fetelor .(ma gandesc ca mai bine ar fi sa mor in somn decat in joaca).

Moment

Merg pe strada. Mii de priviri in jurul meu, dintre care macar cateva se opresc asupra mea. Am parul varza,slinos si ochelari de soare murdari pentru ca sunt boem si trist…asa imi place sa ma vad azi. Sunt plictisit, de fapt, iar chestia asta ma enerveaza. Ma plictisesc. Ma plictiseste decorul asta arhicunoscut,fetele care ma condamna fara sa ma judece macar, sigla"Paine" din anul 1982, Daciile care scot mult mai mult fum decat foc, semaforul,tigarile,eu. M-am plictisit sa fiu nemultumit tot timpul.
Merg pe strada. Ma plimb haotic cu speranta muribunda de a mai gasi ceva nou in mormanul asta de plictiseala,macar ceva de care nu m-am plictisit inca asa de tare. Scotocesc cu ochii casele,vitrinele si barurile, parcul, padurea;imaginile imi vajaie pe langa retina ca si atunci cand,din snobism, merg la tigani la piata sa imi caut blugi pentru zugravit. Nimic. Parca totul e pustiu, desi e ora 14 20 si strazile sunt pline de tot felul de plictisiti, care mai de care mai intoliti.
Dintre toate lucrurile care ma enerveaza, plictiseala trebuie sa fie in top 3. Nu ma enerveaza atat de tare ca ma plictisesc, ci modul in care o fac,rece si fad ca o conserva de sardine.
Fiecare imagine pe care o vad poarta in ea bucatele din puzzle-ul trecutului meu. Asta aproape ca ma face sa regret anii copilariei si adolescentei cand imi doream, visam cu toata puterea la cum o sa fie cand o sa fiu mare. Si uite ca am crescut si tot aceleasi lucruri le vad, la tot pasul. Ma enerveaza exactitatea cu care imi aduc aminte ce s-a intamplat si unde, ma enerveaza colegii mei care sunt pregatiti in orice secunda sa devoreze orice informatie pe care le-as da-o despre viata mea , si asta pentru ca si ei se plictisesc teribil de tare unul pe celalalt cu aceleasi barfe. Le trebuie altele noi. Au nevoie sa se simta un pic mai putin plictisitori si plictisiti emitand ipoteze si judecati de valoare despre ceilalti. Tipic …
M-am plictisit de mine tocmai pentru ca ma vad peste tot. Confund uneori plictiseala cu complacutul in plictiseala, nesimtirea cu curajul,initiativa cu disperarea si tot asa…
Imi ies ochii din cap de nervi cand ma intreaba cineva ce mai fac…si asta ca si cand ar conta. Dupa ce ca nu mai stiu unde sa fug de mine, acum mai trebuie sa si vorbesc despre asta. Suna telefonul si ma sperii. M-am plictisit de soneria asta,inainte ma enerva pentru ca o auzeam prea des, iar acum ca o aud prea rar parca nici nu imi mai vine sa raspund.
Urc in troleu. Pute, desi e iarna. Ma enerveaza compostorul asta de o mie de ani care cred ca lasa pe fiecare bilet alt model de gauri. Ma enerveaza ca nu vine controlu’ acum ca tot am fost un bun cetatean si am compostat. Ma enerveaza babele care isi pun sacosele jegoase pe locul de langa ele si alte babe care stau in picioare si se uita dojenitor la mine pentru ca stau jos. Ma simt mai jegos ca o sacosa. Sunt oricum prea multe ca sa incapa pe locul meu. Asa ca stau jos, ce dracu’.
Ies din troleu si o gramada de oameni ma intampina inca din statie cu familiare imbranceli si impinsaturi . Grohai de parca o sa imi scuip un plaman si se face loc sa trec. Ma amuz plictisit de fetele lor…deja m-au bagat in carantina. Sau nu le place freza mea.
Victorios, ma inscriu in traversare,regulamentar.M-am plictisit sa trec pe rosu si ma enerveaza ca toata lumea o face. Un taximetrist franeaza de parca l-am surprins cu ceva si ma cert cu el in numele tuturor pietonilor nedreptatiti pe teren propriu. Militez. Ma bucur si zambesc…macar asa,putina adrenalina. Imi aprind o tigara si ma lenevesc un pic,parca mi-am mai revenit.2 la 0 pentru mine.
Nu pot sa ma vad in viitor, si asta pentru ca ma sufoca trecutul. Imi amintesc de prietena mea…oare ce-o mai fi facand? Era mai placut sa ne plictisim impreuna, si asta doar pentru ca nervii pe care ii aveam pe tema asta puteam sa ii punem unul in carca celuilalt…ca atunci cand te tine cineva de cap cand vomiti,dar pana una-alta tot in buda esti,nu?
Ma enerveaza ca sunt nervos. O fi de la plictiseala. Nu stiu. S-a facut tarziu.Mi-e lene, poate o sa ma mai plimb si maine.

Alta data(fuga de idei)

De pe balcon va un brad aruncat in zapada felcaloida,topita in praf si moloz. Doi politisti comunitari se autosesizeaza in jurul dashiei logan din dotare, de frig. Liniste. Oamenii se plimba adeziv prin campul meu vizual. Toti au aceeasi culoare maro,eludanta,de camuflaj, ca zloata pe care o tara in picioare ,grabiti si acizi ca saliva intr-o zi de post.
Trece un autobuz scos de la casat si-mi rupe filmul. Am ventuze pe urechi care imi trag gandurile din cap afara silit. Sssst .
Soarele loveste sinestetic in décor.Ma doare ceva, nu stiu exact ce.Ma agit ,neuronal vorbind,fara nici o replica din partea gandurilor. Taximetristul ma face un meteo scurt, asa ca de dimineata, si dupa aia se plange de porcii astia de caini de la putere, imi zice de nevasta-sa si de tigara mea. N-am voie sa fumez in masina pentru ca o sa mai intre si altii dupa mine. Frauda la adresa libertatii altora, zic, si arunc mucul pe geam.
Ieri i-am dat unui boschetar trei tigari si l-am intrebat unde doarme pe frigul asta. Mi-a zis ca pe unde apuca. Zambea obscen,promiscuu,cu gingiile galbene si sparte,parca mi-ar fi zis ca doarme si la mine in pat cand nu sunt noaptea acasa. Sunt inculpat ca ii dau kent si lui i-ar placea sa bage un carpatzi f.f *. Frauda la adresa libertatii retorice de a muri sub cerul liber,ma gandesc, si ii las bricheta . Eu nu mai fumez.
Miroase a metal,apret,ficat si chit.Inseamna ca am ajuns.
E un cancer in spitalul asta…Mancam si ne fumam tigara de dimineata in beci,ca(/cu) sobolanii,in vestiarul asta patologic care te impinge incet-incet ori spre pneumonie, ori spre ciroza. Nu-i calorifer,dar e deschis geamul,compensator si reconciliant. Ma las surprins de “buna dimineata” colegilor ,afara , pe culoar. M-a picurat in cap, cred ca e din tevile astea macabre, nu stiu, nu ma uit ca mi se rebelizeaza parul de pe spate. Femeile de servici cara tomberoane de care ma feresc ca de SIDA.
Pe saloane e razboi. Toti gem de nebagare in seama, numai asistentele miere si cafea in pungi de hartie maro,de camuflaj. Stiu ca in spatele usilor pe care scrie”nu intrati-pastrati linistea” se insinueaza rudele bolnave sau poate prietenii constipati.
O tanti apatica imi povesteste despre matusa ei de 86 de ani care zace icterica, inerta sub patura fecaloida,de camuflaj,in fata mea. Ma gandesc ca,la varsta ei , ar putea pierde lupta cu cancerul linistita,acoperita cu zapada,sub cerul liber. E al dracu de cald aici ,tot aerul mi se lipeste de transpiratie si nu mai pot sa respir. Ii e frica de stetoscopul meu. Mi-e frica de ea. Ce dracu caut eu printre perfuzii si oameni suparati,redundanti,anxiosi? Nu mai inteleg nimic. Ma camuflez eludant in halatul meu alb ca zapada si ies pe culoar. Un scaun cu rotile care nu mai are cauciucuri vegeteaza langa toaleta. Stiu ca nu e décor.
Colegele mele isi inghit sictirul cu pofta. Isi fac numarul ca la circ in fiecare dimineata. Pentru mine e ca un serial difuzat cam devreme la 8 dimineata. Sa vedem…aria matititatii cardiace…batai regulate…”Vi s-au mai umflat vreodata picioarele,domnule?”. Mi-e scarba sa-mi sterg somnul de pe ochi. Ma spal pe maini cu o bucata de sapun si ignor firul de par negru indurat pe el. Il simt in relief. “Simtiti vreodata ca va sufocati noaptea, doamna?”
Doamna doctor e foarte ocupata in dimineata asta,asa ca tipa. Ma uit amnezic la ea si ma scuteste de diagnostic.
Un handicapat o pipaie pe infirmiera care ii schimba scutecele maro,fecaloide. “Ar trebui sa stai ca un caine,porcule”. Ma gandesc la Hitler, un gard de sarma ghimpata ruginita…genocid.
Blocurile de peste drum se scalda in soarele pustiu ca niste viermi imensi cu striatii termopan. Geamurile astea nu se dezaburesc niciodata, cred, iar majoritatea bolnavilor nu vor si,ce-i drept,nu prea au unde sa se spele. Nu poti judeca un om cu nasul, ma gandesc,si ies afara.
Urasc liftul asta programat sa se opreasca la toate etajele. Nu ma ajuta deloc.
Vestiarul e plin-ochi si imi gasesc complici cu care fumez satisfacut. Gata-s-a terminat si ma car cu greu afara, unde soarele s-a cam afumat si el. E gri.
Cineva a avut inititativa de a lua bradul de sub balconul meu, asa ca nu mai am la ce sa ma uit. Rutina vs. Alzheimer,ma gandesc, e ca a nu vrea vs. a nu putea.


* fara filtru